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Grown up survey (doesn't really pertain to me |
| The "Grown Up" Survey (meant to be completed by those out of high school) 1.What bill do you hate paying the most?A thousand bucks a year to HISD to turn out idiots and criminals?!?I could do it for half that.2.Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?Couch, pizza, beer.Would have been better if someone else were there.6.What do you really want to be doing right now?the internet survey.............?7.What did you want to be when you were growing up?A writer.This isn?t close enough.8.How many colleges did you attend?North Harris, Uof H, and the International Institute of Awesomeness.9.Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now?It was closest to me when I randomly picked it up off the floor.10.What are your thoughts on gas prices?I?m on the wrong end of this scam.11.If you could move anywhere and take someone with you, where & who?Nowhere with an abundance of hippies, cold, or laws prohibiting fun.I?d take Lukey-Luke.That would probably ensure my immediate return.12.First thought when the alarm went off this morning?Hungry.13.Last thought before going to sleep last night?Lazy to make myself a snack.14.Favorite style of underwear?Free.16.What errand/chore do you despise?Screwing/unscrewing the bottle.17.If you didn?t have to work, would you volunteer?Volunteer myself to the blackjack tables.18.Get up early or sleep in?Compromise.Stay up till really early.19.What is your favorite cartoon character?Master Shake, The Redhead from CSI Miami, and Katie Couric.20.Favorite thing to do at night with a girl/guy?Ask how they came to be a girl/guy.Then making them drop their pants to prove it.21.Have you found real love yet?To love yourself, it is the greatest love of all...22.When did you first start feeling old?When I said, "I remember when gas prices where a dollar a gallon."23.Favorite 80?s movie?The one where Daniel-san rides his bike with the alien in front of the moon while the red-head girl leads the orphanage and Johnny-five in song.24.Your favorite lunch meat?peanut butter.25.What do you get every time you go into Sam?s Club?Kicked out for not being a member.26.Beach or lake? |
| Beach or lake?Beach to chill, lake to hide the bodies.27.Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual?Taxes are an outdated ritual.28.Do you own properties?In 29 years I will.It?ll be all mine!29.Favorite guilty pleasure?It ain?t the internet surveys.30.Favorite movie you wouldn?t want anyone to find out about?Hudson Hawk.If you can kill a dog and make it funny, your movie is solid!31.What?s your drink?Anything I have to lie to a cop about.32.Cowboys or Indians?I was at my first gunshow and a round went off.I immediately thought "Al Queda?s storming the gun show!(it wasn?t)" I?ve never been happier to be in a room full of confederate-flag wearing cowboys in my whole life.Plus, I hate Curry.34.Who from high school would you like to run into?I?d like to run into HighSchoolLilia so I can kick her ass and fix her bangs.And get her to invest.And put all her money on the Rockets to sweep the Magic in ?95!36.Norm or Cliff?Barney.Original Barney, not the lame-o coffe one!38.Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back?Mistakes are for politicians and celebrity "apologies."39.Do you like the person who sits directly across from you at work?If he?s reading this, yes!If not, someone who knows him is. 40.What famous person would you like to have dinner with?If they pay, Trump.?If I pay, Mischa Barton.?42.Have you ever crashed your vehicle?Given my unhealthy love for the mama-moblie, no. 43.Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purpose?What else is it for?44.Last book you read for real?I only fake read, as apparently that is a real thing.47.Somewhere in California you?ve never been and would like to go?Inside the Treasury Vault with a forklift and immunity.48.Do you go to church?And I haven?t burst into flames yet.49.At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or a new relationship?I?ll double down on this one.50.Just how OLD are you?Older than the Olsons, younger than yo?mama. |
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